Confessions of a Teenage Yamanaka
by Inu Kaiba
Summary: Based on Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen. Yamanaka Ino moves to Iwaki and gets her life twisted upside down; in a mess with Haruno Sakura, her fav band Umazaki, and that totally hot guy Shikamaru. ShikaIno


Disclaimer: If I bothered to make one, I don't own it. I don't own Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen copyrights. Dyan Sheldon owns that, and if I did I'd be rich. I don't own Naruto and if I did, my name would be Masashi Kishimoto but it's not.

Summary: Based on Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen. Yamanaka Ino, Drama Queen, moves to Iwaki and gets her life twisted upside down; in a mess with Haruno Sakura, her fav band Umazaki, her new best friend Hyuuga Hinata, and that totally hot guy Shikamaru. ShikaIno. NaruHina. SasuSaku. NejiTen.

Inu Kaiba: I dedicate this to Riekoish because she is the greatest friend ever and she dedicated something to me!

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The Life of Yamanaka Ino

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_It's sad really, but the truth is when I was born the sun's aura blocked out the moon's aura and created some sort of aura that gave my mother a sudden totally brilliant flash to not name me Ino; but instead named me Ivy. As much as I like how well Ivy describes me; it's a serious mistake. Sure I can be as prickly as the vine if I want to be and I must have thorns because I can make people's hearts sting; but the name Ino just suits me so well._

_I don't remember what happened really, it was just one moment I was reading this comic where one of the characters looked freakily close to that of my personality and looks; but who the hell's been looking through my window long enough to learn this stuff is gonna get a punch in the face I can tell you that for sure. Especially if they saw me naked. Then their death wish will be granted as fast as you can say 'Ino-pig' which I'm anything but._

_I don't know why, but Ino just suits me. It's different and special, and perfect for someone independent; someone like me._

_Ivy just seems so prissy and stuck up, like some bitch who's got a stick up her ass twenty four-seven. I'm not like that, really I'm not. I mean I can act like a total bitch sometimes but not unless I know someone deserves it._

_Being the kind person I am; I will forgive my family for this error. After all, it's not their fault that the sun's and the moon's auras weren't up to par. I don't blame God either, he can't help that his planets went suddenly and completely out of whack. _

_Some say when special stuff like that happens, you're destined to be someone; namely me. My mom says I'm crazy, and it's my fault I don't like the name 'Ivy' and just decided I wanted a new name. Please. She calls me a Drama Queen like it's nothing, like I'm always like this. But I'm not. I'm just totally spiritual and have strong beliefs in the fact that my soul is stronger than most people's, and that's why my soul is so strong and powerful. _

_However; even though it's no one's fault I was named Ivy it doesn't have to be final. When I turn eighteen and have the free will power to move out of my house and into the city, or wherever I choose to move, I'm going to change my name to Yamanakka Ino. Or Yamanaka Ino. I have yet to decide what the spelling will be._

_But of course I have yet to convince my twin brother and sister… and my mom… Well mostly, I have yet to convince my 'Immediate family' that my soul was born as an Ino and not an Ivy._

_At least the name Ivy is pretty and not some bitch name that's totally crappy and unsuitable for someone like me. It could be worse personally. I could have been named Sakura. But for an outside personality, I can be an Ivy. However my soul is an Ino._

_Ivy's the name I was born with and that's what we're going to use; that's what they all say. But they can't stop me from trying to convince the world; I can be and am a Yamanaka Ino. _

_But the most shocking truth is no one in my family understands me. It's just their souls aren't deep enough to understand the depth of my soul. But you can't expect a few seven year olds and a table worker at a nearby restaurant to understand the depth of someone like me. _

_They just think it's some stage I've going through, though I point out I've been like this since I was born. When I announced I was going to be an actor; they all looked at me as if it was just some random outburst and not this dream I've had since I was in my own mother's womb._

_She thinks I don't know she calls me Drama Queen, but I do. I hear her saying it when she talks to my dad, and occasionally when she's on the phone with someone else from the small quaint Yamanaka family._

"_Oh, this week she died her hair black and put on her black cape to mourn the death of some squirrel who got hit by a car. She brought the dead thing home and buried it in the yard, can you believe? Good thing I got rid of it; or it would have rotted and stunk up the yard. Or the twins might have found it and tried to eat it. Or worse used the rotting dead thing as a play thing to beat each other over the head with." My mother had told my father, Yamanaka Inoshi over the phone a few weeks back. I still haven't gotten over the fact that she threw out that squirrel. It had a right to have a nice resting place beneath the soil, even if our backyard isn't as pretty and lush as it could be. It could have returned to the soil and made a nice meal for the bugs. Instead it's lying in some trash bag doing nothing for our environment but taking up space._

_I mean, if I had a choice I'd rather be buried in this desert like backyard instead of thrown in a trash bag and dragged off to the dump._

_The twins called me 'The Black Widow' for a month at least. I think they thought it was really intelligent, despite the fact that they have no clue what widow means._

_Since they have a different father then I do, I assume that whatever happened with the sun and the moon must have blessed me. I have a quest one day to find someone who was born like me, we might be soul mates. But if I don't find that guy who's my soul mate, I'll settle for something close to it._

_I'm like the girl who stands out, the Social Outcast who doesn't mind being just that. _

* * *

I paused there, my purple pen hovering over the creamy white page in my hot pink journal; which was covered with 'Warning' and 'Danger' and 'Keep out' stickers I had used on it. When I had bought the set of stickers, it had come with a t least a hundred of them with one about as big as half my door and some about the size of my thumb in the shape of a yield sign with an exclamation mark on it.

When I had seen it in the store, I couldn't resist buying it and when I left the store; my wallet was short 5 dollars, and my hand was clamped around a plastic bag with the word CLAIRE'S on it in a dark purple colouring.

After plastering the stickers all over my door; and believe me it took hours to convince my mom to let me actually cover my door in the damn stickers; I had about 20 or so of the smaller stickers left over and had decided to decorate my journal with them.

I paused placing the pen down on the fresh page I had just turned on to, trying to figure out how to continue my story. I stared out the window watching the leaves dance in the wind beginning their slow descent to the earth. They looked so happy and carefree; but they were so lucky too. They never had to deal with Haruno Sakura, or someone who punished them for breathing the same air they did. If leaves could breathe air.

Finally, with a desperate sigh I picked my pen back up chewing on the end of it; enough to leave bite marks but not enough to bite write though and have the purple liquid splatter the inside of my mouth with its unpleasant taste. Finally, pen met paper and the words just seemed to flow out of the pen. The pen was my inspiration and it continued the story as it had before.

_

* * *

To expect people in my family to understand me, you'd have to be incredibly stupid. I'd agree with you; but only if you had an insanely strong back up argument with which to prove me wrong. I mean, if a pig can communicate with a duck then there is a slim chance my family might understand me. But, I'm going to continue with my close minded ways and believe my family does not understand me._

_For if you were to take the opposite way; and say the pig failed to communicate with the duck that would be the way I see my family in the situation of whether they understand me or not._

We fail to communicate in the sense that my family doesn't understand me and I don't understand the 'sheltered' way they live.

_Getting to the point, I started writing this journal because I needed somewhere to tell my life story. After all life is so randomly beautiful and you don't want to forget the random and the beauty of it. _

_One of the reasons I started writing it though, is because I needed somewhere to place my deep sorrow and anger. Because one day out of the blue my life became so different if you whacked me in the face with a shoe before and now my reactions would be complete opposites. _

_My mother told me to pack up one day, out of the blue, because we were moving to Iwaki. Well a suburb of Iwaki strangely entitled Konoha. My little brother practically painted a sign on his head after that saying, 'Konoha, Iwaki, Japan' was named after me and consistently told people he was moving to a town with his name in it._

_I'd lived in Tokyo my entire life but nothing had prepared me for this. My protests fell on deaf ears however as my mother forced me to accept by saying we could just move to Fukuoka and then I'd never see Tokyo again ever._

_So I reluctantly agreed knowing I could at least visit Tokyo and my dad who lived there every so often._

_Like most semi-creative people, I can't stand living in a place without creativity. Those places who believe you can't be born blonde and still be smart. You have to die your hair blonde to be a blonde without the blonde jokes. At least in the city being blonde is an expression of your soul, that and it doesn't matter. _

_Living in the suburbs it's like being dead, with cable TV and fast food delivery, and without a creative soul. In Tokyo, it's cultural and interesting and different; and when you get excited it's over something like a going-to-be famous movie being filmed there. Here the most exciting thing is getting a makeover; for you or your house. _

_Besides there's always something new going on in Tokyo; and a famous person to meet. I once bumped into Jackie Chan on the street. He was just walking down the street, trying not to get noticed. But if I really wanted to meet an actor I'd just go to where a movie's being shot. I've met enough famous people to have them coming out my ears, or the autographs at least. But I lost interest in that sort of thing shortly before my mother dropped the bomb that we were leaving the city.  
_

_My mother says it's too uncomfortable living in Tokyo, and she'd rather live in a real place where you aren't spending fifty years in rush hour traffic or saying a rushed sorry fifty times as you run down the street to wherever you going. It's like being in a sea that needs to be thinned out. Of course she didn't really say this I'm just over dramatizing everything again._

_That and we moved because Konohamaru and Moegi needed a normal life. I pointed out you can have a normal life there, I grew up there. "That's the problem." My mom said. "Look how you turned out." After seething in my anger at this offense from my mom nonetheless, I accepted defeat and continued packing up my stuff to move to this dead 'Konoha' town._

_But I understood after all. If they were to turn out to be like my mother's standards of normal, they needed to move at an impressionable age so they could act like they'd lived somewhere like Konoha all their life._

_I'd tried to convince my mom to let me stay with my dad after all he still lived in Tokyo and he had a spare bedroom. She insisted he didn't need someone like me around 24/7 nor could he stand it. Personally I believe she thinks that if she moves me out of Tokyo I might act more normal if the world around me was more normal and not crazy and bouncing off the walls._

_However there was a silver lining to this dark and gloomy cloud; and that silver lining was I'd no longer be around the kids I'd grown up with. I wouldn't be that kid who threw up at Higurashi Kagome's_**1**_ 13th birthday party after those kids…_**drugged **_the punch. Or put alcohol in it. However you want to look at it, you can._

_Now I could be whoever I wanted to be. It was a blank piece of paper waiting for a story to be written on it. My story that is. I, Ino Yamanaka (or Yamanakka) would become someone that would simply convince people there was no need for drugs and sex by being a shining light in their otherwise dull lives. And looking back on that now, I couldn't have been more wrong._

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Inu Kaiba: If you know your geography there is an Iwaki not to far from Tokyo, but of course there is no Konoha suburb there… Hehe. Also, Tokyo is going to be the equivalent of New York since I just can't see Ino living in New York.

**1** – Yes I am hinting toward Kagome from InuYasha

Next chapter: The Life of Yamanaka Ino part 2 – As Recorded by Yamanaka Ino

Enter Haruno Sakura, the most popular girl in school and her sidekick Tenten. Sakura plus Ino equals a mix that's definitely not going to work; and these are two girls that could have been friends… were they to meet under different circumstances.


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